How Do I Do It?

I don't.

I have been getting this question it seems like a lot lately. See I am a single mother of two little hearts. I never know how to answer this question because I can't keep up with my everyday life and I feel like a failure most of the time. There are so many ways I fall short. There are so many things I want to be there for but I can't. There are so many times I should have done things a different way. My house is usually always a disaster. We eat cereal for dinner more times a week than we probably should. There are so many times I have broken down in heartbroken agony night after night from pure exhaustion from pouring everything that I am into my children because they deserve nothing less. There are so many times I have yelled out in frustration, wondering why I have to do this alone.

I didn't plan to be raising two kids in a fatherless home by myself but this is where life has brought me. Life is messy and unrelenting at times but it is in this that I have learned to choose joy even when I do not know what is ahead. It is in this that I have realized I can not be a father to my children but I can be a dang good mother and that's what I'm going to do. It is in this that I have learned that He is so good and He holds me up when I can no longer stand.

So no i don't always stay steady on my feet, like it may appear from where you are standing, but I can either choose to let the broken edges of my past continue to wound and break me or I can let God take those broken pieces and mold me into a beautiful new vessel full of grace and mercy. If I am going to walk this unexpected journey then, gosh dang it, it will not be vain and I will let His glory shine through my weaknesses.